Call For Help!

Okay, so I’ve been fiddling with the interior of WAITING, but I need help with the blurb for the back cover. Here’s what I’ve come up with, and as I find this process the hardest to put together, I’m asking for your help. If you don’t mind giving advice, I’d welcome your input.

EVE SMITH ISN’T A NORMAL GIRL.

Sure, two different coloured eyes is maybe an exception, add the ability to see visions and hear voices, and normal becomes an untouchable ideal. But if it’s her destiny to save humankind, it has its advantages.

Fate, on the other hand, has another agenda.

Abandoned by her dream companion to the demons of her nightmares, a dark figure comes to her aid, igniting a cascade of events that forces Eve in search of answers.

Tormented by her visions, Eve seeks the help of her therapist, awakening a part of her otherworldly life she had no idea existed. A forgotten destiny that connects Bastian’s, the dark figure, with her own.

A caregiver dies. Eve survives an attack on her life, and she soon discovers the new girl at the home is the culprit.

Sent to Cambridge to recuperate, Eve uncovers a hidden secret to her past. However, is the tale “The Guardians” have woven indeed real: are Bastian and Eve truly soul guides? Or does a deeper meaning lurk in the past, waiting to be uncovered?

Does it flow? Does it make sense? Should I start over again? As I said, any input would be greatly appreciated.

 

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6 thoughts on “Call For Help!

  1. When it comes to blurb, I follow the advice of an expert who did this kind of thing for a living, who told me, write long, edit short. In my opinion, and this is just my opinion, you’re at the ‘write long’ stage, now you need to chop your blurb about and prune out the additional information you don’t need.

    You started really strongly, but I felt when I read on that you’re trying to get too much of your plot into the blurb, e.g. Sure, two different coloured eyes is maybe an exception, add the ability to see visions and hear voices, and normal becomes an untouchable ideal, I’d prune a bit to something like (and I’m only guessing at your intentions here, so this is just as example) Different coloured eyes are just the start; add in visions and hearing voices, and normal becomes an untouchable ideal

    I’d also decide what in those last four paragraphs is the most important idea you want to grab people with, because they run long. And can you combine some of the points, again, just an idea:
    Abandoned by her dream companion to the demons of her nightmares, a dark figure comes to her aid, igniting a cascade of events that forces Eve in search of answers.

    Tormented by her visions, Eve seeks the help of her therapist, awakening a part of her otherworldly life she had no idea existed. A forgotten destiny that connects Bastian’s, the dark figure, with her own.

    to

    Tormented by her visions, Eve seeks the help of her therapist, awakening a part of her otherworldly life she had no idea existed – a forgotten destiny that connects a dark figure’s fate with her own.

    • Now, that’s what I’m looking for, constructive help! I see what you mean, I do have a tendency to over-extend things, don’t I.
      Is the last part okay, or do you think I need to take the pruning shears to that as well? Thanks for your input. 🙂

      • I do think that needs the pruning sheers as well 🙂 You probably only need one more short paragraph to round everything off. I found the punch is in A caregiver dies. Eve survives an attack on her life,, and I think you can condense the rest of what you are trying to say into one more statement, a round off to follow those two sentences, posing one of your questions.

  2. As a non writer, I found that intriguing enough to get my interest…but agree with Sophie about that punchline. That one line alone would have me reaching for my money!

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